February 2014 Marriage & Relationship Series…

Feb 1, 2014   //   by Tina McCrea   //   Blog  //  Comments Off on February 2014 Marriage & Relationship Series…

“How To Build A Love Base Foundation”

 low angle view of a newlywed couple standing together outside a church

Luke 6:48-49 (NLT)

48 It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built. 49 But anyone who hears and doesn’t obey is like a person who builds a house without a foundation. When the floods sweep down against that house, it will collapse into a heap of ruins.”




One thing is for sure when it comes to love and marriage, love cannot be bought, it must be built. You absolutely cannot buy love; you must build love within a relationship. In today’s society, many are willing to buy tokens of love and affection versus building a true foundation of love in a marriage. Relationships are in the tug-of-war of buying vs. building. Anyone can buy something, but not everyone is equipped to build. Many are willing to buy, but many are not willing to take the time to build their marriage and relationship continually.



To build means to construct (especially something complex) by assembling and joining parts or materials: to establish, increase, or strengthen. To build something is to mold, form, or create it. It also means to engage in order to develop something toward a maximum and intense climax.



Marriage and relationships although complex must be constructed, assembled, and joined together so that the established love between two individuals can increase, strengthen, engage, and develop towards a maximum and intense climax of their being. When a marriage is built, then it is able to achieve the maximum and intense climax of love.



What are the foundational steps to building a love base marriage? Building a marriage is like building a house or a home. Actually, the two go hand-in-hand. The first step is found in the parable of Luke 6. The first step to building the love base of a marriage is to Dig Deep.


Love is not superficial. We must go deep when it comes to love. We must take all the covers off, remove the masks, and get naked and unashamed with one another. Digging deep is allowing your spouse the ability to express themselves and tell of their past without feeling judged. Digging Deep causes you to believe in your spouse no matter what, and to forgive without resentment. Digging deep is the ability to let go of all selfishness and to put the needs of your spouse in a primary position of priority in your life. When digging deep, no subject, issue, or situation should be inaccessible by a spouse, who should be your best friend and confidant.


Digging deep is the ability to see the “inner” aspects of all of your spouse’s flaws and imperfections and still find them absolutely amazing. Digging deep allows you to go to an untapped place that no one has ever been within your spouse’s dreams, emotions, passions, and past. You cannot dig deep without hard work and patient time.


In the natural, imagine digging a massive hole in your backyard. You get a shovel, and you could be out there for hours or days digging. Digging deep does not happen overnight, it is a process to love, grow, and become more compatible with your spouse. Digging deep does not quit or stop when you come to place that you don’t like about your spouse, but rather you love, challenge, and pray for your spouse to change.


Not only do we have to dig deep according to the parable of Luke 6, but we must also build marriages on a solid rock. What are the attributes of Rock Solid Love?



  • Faith 
  • Honesty 
  • Truth 
  • Integrity 
  • Commitment 
  • Passion 
  • Forgiveness 
  • Patience 
  • Giving 
  • Servitude 
  • Loyalty 
  • Maturity/Growth 
  • Sex 
  • Fun 


All relationships will experience hardships, trials, tribulations, and storms, but if that relationship is built on love with solid rock attributes then when issues occur, the relationship will be able to stand firm, because it was well built.


If relationships are bought and not built, then they will not be ones that are “dug deep” into passion, trust, loyalty, truth, strength, and love. There will be no foundation because these relationships were bought; they are superficial, non-transparent, & non- committed.


To Buy means to acquire the possession of something, or the right to, by paying or promising to pay an equivalent, especially in money; to purchase. It means to acquire by exchange or concession; to hire or obtain the services of; to bribe or corrupt.


No person wants to be treated as a possession, but rather as a purpose and priority in a marriage. A relationship based on the “buy” foundation is one of business transactions, and a goods & services partnership… “You do for me then I do for you.” These relationships are score keeping relationships. They are based on an exchange of goods and services, they bribe, corrupt, and they lack true love and intimacy.


Therefore, there is no foundation, structure, and nothing about them is fortified. So when the hardships, trials, tribulations, and storms come, these “bought” relationships will collapse into a heap of ruins.


Love Building Materials to use this week in order to Dig Deep & Build A Love Base Foundation in Your Marriage!


  • Build with your Words…Don’t Destroy! 
  • Build with your Affection! 
  • Build with your Time! 
  • Build with your Acts of Service! 
  • Build with your Sexual Intimacy/Love Making! 




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